yf( [{"guid":"380","link":"http:\/\/www.clarkeology.com\/m\/380\/Closed+on+a+Saturday+night","title":"Closed on a Saturday night","description":"When we went past on Saturday night (11th October), it seemed to be closed, what a shame."},{"guid":"619","link":"http:\/\/www.clarkeology.com\/m\/619\/Who+is+closed%3F","title":"Who is closed?","description":"Ha, a side effect of making every artist on every bill a link on the new <strong>barfly<\/strong> site is <a href=\"http:\/\/www.barflyclub.com\/who\/is\/Closed\">this<\/a>..."},{"guid":"1305","link":"http:\/\/www.folkestonegerald.com\/m\/1305\/That%27s+a+closeup+of+a+merkin","title":"That's a closeup of a merkin","description":"For all the hundreds and thousands of people out there who accidentally shaved off their pubic hair and now regret it like crazy and simply can't wait for thier own hair to grow back: at this site you can buy fake pubic hair. For guys as well. And yo... "},{"guid":"1550","link":"http:\/\/www.folkestonegerald.com\/m\/1550\/As+one+door+closes...","title":"As one door closes...","description":"Delighted to discover this weekend that bucking the trend of bars and restaurants closing, there's a new face in town, a really rather ace looking new bar...The Office is a spanking new basement bar on The Leas that we found by chance yesterday. It's... ","category":{"1":"folkestone"}},{"guid":"1758","link":"http:\/\/www.clarkeology.com\/m\/1758\/I%27m+ready+for+my+close+up+Mr+Burton","title":"I'm ready for my close up Mr Burton","description":"They're STILL filming something on Manor Road, in a big old building that has \"Depository\" on the front, the trucks have been camped outside it for a few days now, and you can see lights and things inside. In my mind, it's Johnny Depp filming Charlie... ","category":{"1":"javascript"}},{"guid":"1877","link":"http:\/\/www.clarkeology.com\/m\/1877\/So+close+to+a+free+iMac","title":"So close to a free iMac","description":"I have this free computer in my grasp now, it powers up and seems to work OK, but it wants a password, without which I can't even eject the CD drive, so I've no idea how to reformat it... any ideas? Any Mac types out there?Work is getting a bit stres... "},{"guid":"3381","link":"http:\/\/www.clarkeology.com\/m\/3381\/So+close!","title":"So close!","description":"The Foo Fighters apparently had a secret gig lined up at Portsmouth Wedgewood Rooms tonight. But it's been cancelled because Dave has a dicky throat... how good would that have been?... "},{"guid":"3495","link":"http:\/\/www.folkestonegerald.com\/m\/3495\/Britannia+Inn+closed+for+the+summer","title":"Britannia Inn closed for the summer","description":"Apparently The Brit is shut for the next three months, undergoing a monster refit and expansion, opening with a new restaurant. Looking forward to seeing it!"},{"guid":"4638","link":"http:\/\/www.folkestonegerald.com\/m\/4638\/Folkestone+Computers+has+closed+then","title":"Folkestone Computers has closed then","description":"Or did it move? Anyone know?I can see there being less call for a cybercafe type place in this day and age, with everyone having their own kit and wifi hotspots being abundant, even in our town.If you're looking for some computer support, and you mig... "},{"guid":"4672","link":"http:\/\/www.folkestonegerald.com\/m\/4672\/It%27s+all+still+there+isn%27t+it%3F+Just+closed+down","title":"It's all still there isn't it? Just closed down","description":"Doesn't look a lot of fun at all. Surely there's plenty of fun to be had in the town without the actual rides..? Though of course we do still have rides - one go on the funicular railway is enough excitement for me."},{"guid":"6237","link":"http:\/\/www.folkestonegerald.com\/m\/6237\/%2Athis+close%2A","title":"*this close*","description":"<br \/>Is that very close?  I think all the \"famous\" people up here have migrated to THAT London.  Damn them!!!<br \/><br \/>*waggles fist*"},{"guid":"6596","link":"http:\/\/www.clarkeology.com\/m\/6596\/Camdemonium+Competition+Closed","title":"Camdemonium Competition Closed","description":"The Camdemonium Competition is closed now, stay tuned for the winners, they'll be announced this afternoon...If it's you, you'll get an email, and you'll have to respond, and you can pick the tickets up in Camden tomorrow evening.Also, a special rule... "},{"guid":"6625","link":"http:\/\/www.clarkeology.com\/m\/6625\/PopBitch+NOT+to+be+closed+down","title":"PopBitch NOT to be closed down","description":"If you had to pick your top three websites right now you'd go for popEx first, right? And then second and third, you'd be tied between Am I Hot Or Not and Pop Bitch probably, wouldn't you? Well there have been some EVIL RUMOUR MONGERS suggesting PopB... ","category":["popbitch","popex"]},{"guid":"6705","link":"http:\/\/www.clarkeology.com\/m\/6705\/Feeder%3F+What+were+they+thinking+of%3F","title":"Feeder? What were they thinking of?","description":"Feeder on the front cover? It wouldn't surprise me if the Melody Maker doesn't last much longer at this rate.Things should be OK though, on Tuesday I spoke to a source close to the editor who denied it was to close, and again on Wednesday management ... ","geo:point":{"lat":"51.0710","lon":"1.1790"},"geo":{"lat":"51.0710","lon":"1.1790"},"category":["melody maker","popex","feeder"]},{"guid":"6934","link":"http:\/\/www.clarkeology.com\/m\/6934\/PopEx+not+really+being+closed","title":"PopEx not really being closed","description":"Happy April Fools all.<br \/><br \/>Now please stop emailing me with suggestions of how to keep it running, it was just a gag."},{"guid":"7206","link":"http:\/\/www.clarkeology.com\/m\/7206\/List+of+Craigs","title":"List of Craigs","description":"The winner of the Craig Armstrong tickets came up with these:Craig Fairbrass (used to be in Neighbours)Craig Charles (Red Dwarf)Craig McGlochlan (used to be in Neighbours)Craig Dowd (Rugby Player)Larry Craig (US Senator)Craig Johnson (footballer)Crai... "},{"guid":"7210","link":"http:\/\/www.clarkeology.com\/m\/7210\/Free+tickets+to+see+Craig+Armstrong+at+the+Barbican","title":"Free tickets to see Craig Armstrong at the Barbican","description":"Well, not really free, you have to win them, I have a pair to give away for his show on Sunday. No I wasn't aware of him either, but from the Barbican website (http:\/\/www.barbican.org.uk\/onlyconnect\/) we have:Composer Armstrong is no stranger to coll... ","category":{"1":"popex"}},{"guid":"7273","link":"http:\/\/www.clarkeology.com\/m\/7273\/Chemical+Brothers+tickets+to+be+won...","title":"Chemical Brothers tickets to be won...","description":"Want a pair of tickets to see Chemical Brothers in Portsmouth on 19 March (Tuesday)?The question to this competition is:Chemical Brothers next single \"Come With Us\" (released 22 April) will be remixed by which heavy weight DJ?Email your answer do che... ","category":{"1":"popex"}},{"guid":"7456","link":"http:\/\/www.clarkeology.com\/m\/7456\/Win+tickets+to+Five+Night+Stand+tonight!","title":"Win tickets to Five Night Stand tonight!","description":"It is Thursday and you are looking for a one night stand tonight.  Why not try your luck in Ocean Hackney.  MTV 5 Night Stands presents eccentric Super Furry Animals \/ explosive The Cooper Temple Clause and up and coming new British rock act Vex Red.... "},{"guid":"7483","link":"http:\/\/www.clarkeology.com\/m\/7483\/Having+the+time+of+your+life","title":"Having the time of your life","description":"As predicted here a week or two ago, Kylie Minogue performed Abba's Dancing Queen at the close of the 2000 Sydney Olympics... Way to go KYLIE!What can replace the Olympics in our lives? Only MUSIC - when will there be a Music Olympics? The guestlist ... "},{"guid":"7510","link":"http:\/\/www.clarkeology.com\/m\/7510\/Soundtrack+of+our+Lives+Tour","title":"Soundtrack of our Lives Tour","description":"They're ace, good opportunities to see them up close here:Soundtrack Of Our Lives @ Manchester University, Manchester (Tue 7 May) [info \/ details]Soundtrack Of Our Lives @ Mean Fiddler, London (Wed 8 May) [info \/ details]Soundtrack Of Our Lives @ Liv... ","category":{"1":"popex"}},{"guid":"7709","link":"http:\/\/www.clarkeology.com\/m\/7709\/Free+gig+in+Glasgow","title":"Free gig in Glasgow","description":"Wed  25th June, Barfly Glasgow, 8pm - 11pm Ursula MinorCloserFreeview   Barfly would like to invite you and your friends to the first of the 105.2 FM The Storm unsigned nights. The more people that attend = the better the gig = the more we prove to t... "},{"guid":"7879","link":"http:\/\/www.clarkeology.com\/m\/7879\/No+no+no+no+no+no...+ooh+close!","title":"No no no no no no... ooh close!","description":"This headline: Libertines Joined By Very Special Guest At Love Music Hate Racism Gigjust gave me the fear on reading the thetripwire.com mailout - I remembered a rumour that Brett Anderson and Bernard Butler were going to get back together and perfor... ","geo:point":{"lat":"51.0800","lon":"1.1645"},"geo":{"lat":"51.0800","lon":"1.1645"},"category":["music","popex","suede","libertines","clash","php"]},{"guid":"8073","link":"http:\/\/www.folkestonegerald.com\/m\/8073\/As+one+store+closes...","title":"As one store closes...","description":"So, we're getting a Starbucks in Folkestone within the next two weeks, according to a small news piece in the Herald. You may think these chain coffee stores are the enemy, but they're surely a sign of regeneration, which is a good thing. AND, they d... 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","category":{"1":"folkestone"}},{"guid":"8087","link":"http:\/\/www.folkestonegerald.com\/m\/8087\/I%27m+picturing+the+centre+of+town+just+being+closed+off+altogether","title":"I'm picturing the centre of town just being closed off altogether","description":"but down on the seafront, I'm seeing a marina, a casino, Aston Martins racing around the East Cliff, it could be a winner."},{"guid":"8093","link":"http:\/\/www.folkestonegerald.com\/m\/8093\/RE:+As+one+store+closes...","title":"RE: As one store closes...","description":"Getting a Starbucks is not a sign of regeneration... They are everywhere. They're just expanding their presence. They just don't have one here yet. Simple as that.A sushi bar opening up in Folkestone - that would be a sign of regeneration... and of m... ","category":{"1":"folkestone"}},{"guid":"8099","link":"http:\/\/www.folkestonegerald.com\/m\/8099\/Nostaliga+Bar+closes,+reopens+as+Euphoria","title":"Nostaliga Bar closes, reopens as Euphoria","description":"Went to Euphoria on Saturday afternoong, which is where The Nostalgia Bar was, which is where The Front was before that. Now the '50s theme has been dropped, and it's just a nice bar again, nice to sit outside anyway, the high energy happy hardcore y... "},{"guid":"8170","link":"http:\/\/www.folkestonegerald.com\/m\/8170\/RE:+As+one+store+closes...","title":"RE: As one store closes...","description":"An old property investment adage has it that a good place to invest is somewhere that has a Blockbuster, but not yet a Starbucks. So Folkestone must be on the up.Dunno what the denizens of Folkestone would make of Fresh & Wild; probably think it was ... ","category":{"1":"folkestone"}},{"link":"http:\/\/www.folkestonegerald.com\/gig\/New-Order-Finsbury-Park\/30293.html","title":"New Order","description":"Pissed down with rain. Crystal, Transmission, Regret, Ceremony, 60 Miles An Hour, Atmosphere, Brutal, Close Range, She's Lost Control, Bizarre Love Triangle, True Faith, Temptation, Love Will Tear Us Apart, (Encore) Digital (with John Simm), Blue Mon... 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See the greatest popstars from the 80s live at the 80s Rewind Festival....","geo:point":{"lat":"51.5375","lon":"-0.9046"},"geo":{"lat":"51.5375","lon":"-0.9046"},"category":["gig"]},{"link":"http:\/\/www.folkestonegerald.com\/gig\/Transfusion-Bryan-Kearney-Rory-Gallagher-ROZZA-Taylor-Close-Attic-Manchester\/216889.html","title":"Transfusion, Bryan Kearney, Rory Gallagher (ROZZA), Taylor & Close","geo:point":{"lat":"53.4410","lon":"-2.2561"},"geo":{"lat":"53.4410","lon":"-2.2561"},"category":["gig"]},{"link":"http:\/\/www.folkestonegerald.com\/gig\/Closed-Chambers\/230385.html","title":"Closed","description":"private function from 7pm","geo:point":{"lat":"51.0782","lon":"1.1767"},"geo":{"lat":"51.0782","lon":"1.1767"},"category":["pub","food","restaurant","mexican","chilli","real ale","music","dj","quiz","cafe","coffee","pool","quiz","jukebox","darts","vegetarian","vegan","bar","booze","drinking"]},{"link":"http:\/\/www.folkestonegerald.com\/gig\/Fester-Sly-Party-Night-All-Welcome-\/233313.html","title":"Fester & Sly Party Night - All Welcome","description":"After that we close for 3 weeks for Re-Furbishment. 9-11pm Free","category":["gig"]},{"link":"http:\/\/www.folkestonegerald.com\/gig\/Equator-Festival-Black-Umfolosi-Leas-Cliff-Hall\/242720.html","title":"Equator Festival: Black Umfolosi","description":"Zimbabwe","geo:point":{"lat":"51.0757","lon":"1.1736"},"geo":{"lat":"51.0757","lon":"1.1736"},"category":["bar","music","child friendly","venue","ticketmaster","gig"]},{"link":"http:\/\/www.folkestonegerald.com\/gig\/Peter-Hook-and-The-Light-perform-Closer-Joy-Division-Celebration-in-London-O2-Academy-2-Islington\/245256.html","title":"Peter Hook and The Light perform Closer. 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